ugg

so today i feel like shit. and i wrote a poem to explain why. and i dont think anyone will get it but its about me falling to deep for this unreal [obsession] and only dealing wiht it by crying. pathetic. but the story of my life: truth: i cant stop crying for my affection for this fantisy. when do i get to wake up and heal the pain with my tears. to love and be in love with a fairytale that knows nothing of how i feel. and those stupid people who think they know it all. but then again who can separate this dream from reality. only i can fool myself i am the only one who can feel this way. not a normal way to love and a strong way to get crushed. falling to deep like an anvil in water. the fear of the future doesnt heal me it only makes the hole deeper. and soon i will be gone from exisitance. all will happen and i will regret not waking up or dreaming forever. eaither way im stuck inbetween and no one can hear me screaming. so i continue to cry and fill my heart with tears that throb the pain with every breath i take. for in this dream i will be the only one who knows the secret and the only one who has to suffer. because i know the truth. and its called reality.